There are somethings I never get used to, no matter how long I have been a nurse. One thing that gets me every time is a kid in pain. Last night Megan and I worked in the ICU and we had 4 patients, 2 kids and 2 adults. We both had one child and one adult. I had Benjamin who is 14 years old. He was referred to the ship by a local hospital (this is quite frequent) with some swelling on his left eye, fever, and a myriad of other symptoms. When he was brought to the ship his frail little body was giving up. He was not very responsive and was rushed to the OR. When I received report (they call it "hand over" here), he had just gotten back from the Recovery room. His head was wrapped with gauze and he just looked so uncomfortable. My heart just aches for kids that are in pain or just uncomfortable. My first instinct is to try to calm them down with soft words and gentle touches (these are the times I wish I could sing better than an ear piercing sqwauk) but none of these measures help. Benjamin was still minimally responsive and gets very agitated at times (he flops around in bed) which is common with people that have brain injuries. Please pray that Ben wakes up and is able to be his regular 14 year old self. When I look at him I wonder what he is like. Does he play soccer? Is he chatty or quiet? I pray that one day I will know.

Each day that I am here I see God working in my life more and more. It shouldn't be a surprise but it is. For some reason (arrogantly I suppose), I  find myself thinking that I will give of myself but not receive as much in return. I am shocked each time when I see God work in my life, man I have so much to learn. I am currently reading Timothy and am learning how to take instruction. Paul writes to Timothy and tells him what to do and also encourages him in his ministry and personal life. Through this I am learning that instructions and encouragement is not bossiness. I have a tendency to become defensive when someone gives me instruction on something that I think I have under control. So, here I go. My goals for now will be... listen, learn, and let go.